Ok, Again

So many emotions, so little time to deal with it. But which feelings should I deal with and which ones should I let go. I have been having a lot of dreams. Most of them are crazy, weird and make no sense. Some of them are very scary and would be a great horror flicks. Most I don't remember but would like to. Mainly because they would be great movies and stories. I also have been thinking about old friends and wondering what happened to my old friends. If they were ever really friends or people just being nice to me. I have also been thinking about what I went to school for, what I do now. I haven been thinking about being unemployed and the need for health insurance. Where should I live? Stay here or move back to California. If I go back to California, should I go back to Long Beach, go to Bakersfield with my brother or go to Sacramento/Carmichael area with my mother and the Loveridges. I still have been getting a lot of headaches. I sleep all day and I am up all night. I don't like tv but I need the noise. I feel to alone with out the noise. Sometimes I have 2 tv's on for the noise. I like making things but does anyone really like what I make or are they just being nice saying the things I make are nice. I make a lot of journals and picture books. All on different subjects. I like making them, it will forever be on going projects. I also have a lot of 1/2 done projects. I wonder if I will ever finish them. I wonder if I will ever have a good and decent job. Also my back has been bothering me a lot. Hurting a lot. I also have started griding my teeth, again. I have been getting into the new show 'True Blood' on HBO. I still wonder who I am an what I want to do with my life. I know one day I will be happy and I will know what to do. I will have goals again and I will go some where.