ok Yeah

So as you can tell, I don't know how to name my random thought posts.

I have been so tired lately, all I want to do is sleep. It is driving me nuts. So I got off my butt last night and open some boxes. I wanted to do more but my next door neighbors were fighting with my downstairs neighbors. It was a mess, the cops came and everything.

My Nile Dancer's unit might fold. There are not enough members of the unit to keep it going. I don't know what to do about it. I talked to my grandmother and I will be talking to the Queen on Wednesday. It is not something I want to do but if there are not enough of us, what do you do?

Work is still a mess, now there is a girl who is trying to get me fired. Like I need help. I get myself in enough trouble with my mouth. I hope she comes to peace with herself and leaves me alone.

I am feeling better about myself now. My brother said something to me that shook me 'You are better than them'. I had to think about it for a day and realized he is right. I need to stop letting everything get to me. No one is perfect, no one thinks about or about the out come of their actions and most people are dumb (either by choice or by actions). It is not my responsibility to take care of them (even though I have to work with them).

I have been doing this thing when I breathe in I say 'breath in love' and when I breathe out I say 'blow out hate'. It has been helping out a lot. Specially when things are starting to get to me. I have to remind myself to chill out and relax, it is not your problem and this is just a job, not my life.

The point of my last post was I want a friend that is physically around. A friend that I can have over. I feel like an ass because of my trust issues. I wish I knew how to get over them.