Lately . . .

I am still feeling down and alone. I still don't want to get out of bed and do anything all day. I am currently thankful for responisbilites that get me out of bed. I am currently also thankful for my mother's voice haunting me saying 'how dare you stay in bed after 9 am'.

I am still looking for work everywhere. I had another job interview this week, I think it went well. I got another lead today. It looks like I will have 3 part time jobs besides my housesitting work.

I had an old friend kind of come back into my life. It has been nice to be able to open up to someone like that. I think I have opened up to much to him and I have scared him. But he has been very helpful to me.

I am listening to the new Kayne West album Heartbreak. It is really good.

I'm going to see Four Christmases tonight with some friends.

I still have hope the future will be better. That I will make it through all of this and become a better person.

I have deciced to go back to church and become Temple worthy again. So this means no more drinking and all that other stuff I did while I worked at Zappos. And yes, I have had a drink or two since leaving Zappos but nothing like I did there and nothing in a month or so.

I still believe in love. If it happens to me or not, I will always believe in it. I like to see other people happy and in love. It does hurt sometimes seeing people in love but I have just to have hope it will happen for me one day.