I am a female, a woman, a lady, a goddess.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
August Rush
I watched this movie the other night. This is an amazing movie. It is an amazing musical movie. It is a movie about a boy with musical amazing talent and his parents. It gives you a great feeling and it makes you want to cheer the characters. It makes you have hope that the characters dreams and goals will come true. I would suggest everyone to watch this movie. I really, really mean this. Specially if you love music, you will love this movie.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0426931/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0426931/
Friday, August 29, 2008
Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium
Is a wonderful and magical movie. It tells a wonderful story of how to believe in yourself no matter your age. To never let go completely of your inner child when you become an adult. There is great job in just simply believing. It is a great family movie. The actors do an amazing job. I watched the special features of the dvd and it made me love the movie even more. I would suggest all families to watch this movie. This movie gives a great you a great feeling at the end and the world it shows to you is amazing, simple and magical.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0457419/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0457419/
The Seeker
I watched this movie this morning. It is a great kids movie. It's about a boy must believe in himself to save his family and his world. It is a good movie for families. It does really well with its history and telling of the story.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0484562/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0484562/
Men with Beards
Ok, I have been noticing a horrible trend with men is coming back. Beards. Beards look bad on men mainly because they look untrimmed, wild and unclean. Beards do not help the appearance of any man. I have never meet a man that I thought looked better with his beard than without it. A clean shaved man is sexy.
Now, more of to the main point of this horrible trend. Men who have flesh colored beards. It doesn't matter your race. If your beard is the same color of your skin (your face) you can not grow a beard. Not because you can't, I'm sure almost all of you can with time and patience. It's because men who have facial hair the same color of their skin and let the facial hair grow out, just makes your face look dirty. Yes I said it. It makes you look like you didn't wash your face or that you missed a spot (depending on the lighting).
Don't get me wrong, some women like the tickle of facial hair. But most woman find it scratch, dirty and just a turn off. I understand some men don't like shaving. Some men shaving hurts them more than it helps. Then by all means go ahead and grow out your facial hair. Just remember to keep it in line Everyday. And also remember it is a turn off for some women.
You men expect us woman to have clean shaved legs, underarms and trimmed bikini lines. We just ask that you to in turn don't grow out your beard.
Now on another hand, I do like goatees and I understand they are not in style. But a nice trimmed, clean goatee is good looking on some men. But for the most part beards are horrible looking.
Now, more of to the main point of this horrible trend. Men who have flesh colored beards. It doesn't matter your race. If your beard is the same color of your skin (your face) you can not grow a beard. Not because you can't, I'm sure almost all of you can with time and patience. It's because men who have facial hair the same color of their skin and let the facial hair grow out, just makes your face look dirty. Yes I said it. It makes you look like you didn't wash your face or that you missed a spot (depending on the lighting).
Don't get me wrong, some women like the tickle of facial hair. But most woman find it scratch, dirty and just a turn off. I understand some men don't like shaving. Some men shaving hurts them more than it helps. Then by all means go ahead and grow out your facial hair. Just remember to keep it in line Everyday. And also remember it is a turn off for some women.
You men expect us woman to have clean shaved legs, underarms and trimmed bikini lines. We just ask that you to in turn don't grow out your beard.
Now on another hand, I do like goatees and I understand they are not in style. But a nice trimmed, clean goatee is good looking on some men. But for the most part beards are horrible looking.
Juno
I finally watched the movie Juno today. It is about a teenage girl, still in high school who has sex one time and got pregnant. Yes, 1 time and she is pregnant. She tries to have an abortion but couldn't go through with it. She knows she can't be a teenage mother, so she gives it up for adoption. She finds a nice couple in the PennySavor of all places. The movie skips to different seasons and mainly focuses on her relationship with the adoption parents. It is very interesting to watch. Great movie for people who are adopted or who have adopted.
You hear a lot about adoption horror stories. But I believe they are all wives tales. You never know how your own biological child is going to end up. You surely have no idea how an adopted child is going end up. And just because they are adopted doesn't mean you treat them different than your own biological family members.
This movie sat with me funny. I liked how it was pro-choice and pro-adoption. But I don't like the adoption father or how it ends. I wanted something more, something different. Teenage pregnancy is no laughing matter. It wasn't easy in 1767 and it isn't easy now. Have children is hard work. It is scary. You don't know what to expect and nothing can prepare you to be parent. But one thing is for sure, don't have children unless you are ready for your life to change forever.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0467406/
You hear a lot about adoption horror stories. But I believe they are all wives tales. You never know how your own biological child is going to end up. You surely have no idea how an adopted child is going end up. And just because they are adopted doesn't mean you treat them different than your own biological family members.
This movie sat with me funny. I liked how it was pro-choice and pro-adoption. But I don't like the adoption father or how it ends. I wanted something more, something different. Teenage pregnancy is no laughing matter. It wasn't easy in 1767 and it isn't easy now. Have children is hard work. It is scary. You don't know what to expect and nothing can prepare you to be parent. But one thing is for sure, don't have children unless you are ready for your life to change forever.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0467406/
Thursday, August 28, 2008
The Spiderwick Chronicles
So I rented from Red box today 3 movies. The first one I watched was The Spiderwick Chronicles. This is a great family movie. This movie is great for kids. With its magical creatures and empowering adventures. It also deals with the fact that a father left his family for another woman. There are gross scenes for the boys. I would suggest everyone man, woman and child to see this movie!
http://www.spiderwick.com/
http://www.spiderwick.com/
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
I am . . . Part 4
I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
or also known as LDS
http://www.lds.org
or also known as LDS
http://www.lds.org
Job Hunt
So looking for a job is horrible. I am on careerbuilder.com all the time. I am also on monster.com, craiglist.com and nevadajobconnect.com I haven't had any phone calls back. It is not cool. I don't know what to do.
To make things worse, my body has gone crazy. Having allergic reactions, don't know why. Medicine isn't helping. On top of that, I sleep all day and I am up all night. I have tried sleeping pills, staying up all night and all day then going to sleep the next night. Nothing is working.
I feel like I am going crazy.
To make things worse, my body has gone crazy. Having allergic reactions, don't know why. Medicine isn't helping. On top of that, I sleep all day and I am up all night. I have tried sleeping pills, staying up all night and all day then going to sleep the next night. Nothing is working.
I feel like I am going crazy.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
I am . . . Part 3
A member of Daughter of the Nile
http://www.donhq.org/about_who.htm
Currently I am a member of Las Vegas Temple # 139 in the Dancers Unit El Gizzerettes. I am President of Unit and a Page for Georgia Howard Princess Royal in the Temple.
What We Are All About:
Members of the Daughters of the Nile are proud of their long association with the Shrine of North America and their continuing support of Shriners Hospitals for Children.
http://www.donhq.org/about_who.htm
Currently I am a member of Las Vegas Temple # 139 in the Dancers Unit El Gizzerettes. I am President of Unit and a Page for Georgia Howard Princess Royal in the Temple.
What We Are All About:
Members of the Daughters of the Nile are proud of their long association with the Shrine of North America and their continuing support of Shriners Hospitals for Children.
I Love . . . Part 17
Anthony Michael Hall
What can I say from movies like 16 Candles to tv shows like The Dead Zone and then appearing in the recent Batman movie The Dark Knight. He is just an amazing actor who is hot. I can't get enough of him.
I Love . . . Part 16
River Phoenix
What can I say, he was an amazing actor and could have done a lot of good with his life. I'm sorry he passed away young.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Crazy Vegas People
So tonight I was at home in the living room of my apartment online looking for work. I have a goal of applying for at least 2 places online a day. I was also flipping channels and thinking to myself what else I need to get done before I go to bed tonight. Then right before 10 PM I heard this crash sound (I live off Green Valley Parkway & Warm Springs). It was really close. The power went out in my apartment and then I heard this weird noise like a washing machine was being dragged down the street.
I got up and poked my head outside. Saw my neighbors looking out at the street (Green Valley Parkway) and saw a big white metal box in the middle of the street. I tried to call the apartment complex but the phone just rang. Then I called 311 (non-emergency police), I got Las Vegas and asked for Henderson. When I got the operator I told her that someone crashed into the bus stop, hit the power box that the box was now in the middle of the street and that I smelled gas. She asked me if I saw the accident and I told her no. I just heard it.
I went back outside and the cops just pulled up. I talked to the neighbors. They said they have lived in the apartment complex since September 2007 and this is the third time this has happened there. The cops then started asking us who saw the accident and the neighbors who did went over to them and spoke to them.
I found out it was white truck, there were truck parts everywhere. Including his bumper in the grass, glass all over the street and fuel everywhere from his truck. I know his truck has to be damaged pretty good. He didn't stay around to see the damaged he caused, he drove off. According to my neighbors it was a man. They think he was drunk.
I called my texted my roommate what happened and that he might want to stay at a friends place tonight. I then called my Grandparents and asked if I could stay at there house tonight. I hope the power comes on and I don't lose anything in my fridge. I just went to CostCo. The neighbor across the way said as long as I don't open the fridge everything should be ok.
I grabbed some things to do at my Grandparents house (they are asleep and I knew I would be up a little later). When I was leaving I saw the City of Henderson truck, several cop cars. The police where shutting down the street as I was leaving (just that side). It was confirmed to be fuel all over the street.
I texted some of my friends and family and told them what happened. Thank you everyone for you concern for me. Something funny was, I was thinking about going to a church (LDS Church) activity on the other side of town (Linden & Sahara) tonight. I would have been getting home at the time of the accident.
I got up and poked my head outside. Saw my neighbors looking out at the street (Green Valley Parkway) and saw a big white metal box in the middle of the street. I tried to call the apartment complex but the phone just rang. Then I called 311 (non-emergency police), I got Las Vegas and asked for Henderson. When I got the operator I told her that someone crashed into the bus stop, hit the power box that the box was now in the middle of the street and that I smelled gas. She asked me if I saw the accident and I told her no. I just heard it.
I went back outside and the cops just pulled up. I talked to the neighbors. They said they have lived in the apartment complex since September 2007 and this is the third time this has happened there. The cops then started asking us who saw the accident and the neighbors who did went over to them and spoke to them.
I found out it was white truck, there were truck parts everywhere. Including his bumper in the grass, glass all over the street and fuel everywhere from his truck. I know his truck has to be damaged pretty good. He didn't stay around to see the damaged he caused, he drove off. According to my neighbors it was a man. They think he was drunk.
I called my texted my roommate what happened and that he might want to stay at a friends place tonight. I then called my Grandparents and asked if I could stay at there house tonight. I hope the power comes on and I don't lose anything in my fridge. I just went to CostCo. The neighbor across the way said as long as I don't open the fridge everything should be ok.
I grabbed some things to do at my Grandparents house (they are asleep and I knew I would be up a little later). When I was leaving I saw the City of Henderson truck, several cop cars. The police where shutting down the street as I was leaving (just that side). It was confirmed to be fuel all over the street.
I texted some of my friends and family and told them what happened. Thank you everyone for you concern for me. Something funny was, I was thinking about going to a church (LDS Church) activity on the other side of town (Linden & Sahara) tonight. I would have been getting home at the time of the accident.
The Water Horse
Rated PG
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0760329/
This movie is based in Scotland during World War II. It is about a boy who found something unusual. He misses his father greatly who is off fighting in the war. The water horse grows a lot over night. The water horse thinks the boy is his father and they have a great relationship. The water horse being a wild animal doesn't understand the bombing that was going on around him and turns on the boy. Everyone starts hunting for the monster in the lake (the Lochness Monster). Then danger appears and everything goes wrong. And then the beautiful happy ending for the water horse. This is a great story. A very good movie and I recommend it for all children and families. It will put a smile on your face, make you laugh, make you cry and make you wish the story was true.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0760329/
This movie is based in Scotland during World War II. It is about a boy who found something unusual. He misses his father greatly who is off fighting in the war. The water horse grows a lot over night. The water horse thinks the boy is his father and they have a great relationship. The water horse being a wild animal doesn't understand the bombing that was going on around him and turns on the boy. Everyone starts hunting for the monster in the lake (the Lochness Monster). Then danger appears and everything goes wrong. And then the beautiful happy ending for the water horse. This is a great story. A very good movie and I recommend it for all children and families. It will put a smile on your face, make you laugh, make you cry and make you wish the story was true.
The Golden Compass
Rated PG
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0385752/
I watched this movie tonight. This is a great kids movie. This is a girl power movie. I hope they make more. Make a series out of it. It is good family movie. It teaches morals and strength. I would recommend a family to watch this. The main actress Dakota Richards will go somewhere in life if she wants too.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0385752/
I watched this movie tonight. This is a great kids movie. This is a girl power movie. I hope they make more. Make a series out of it. It is good family movie. It teaches morals and strength. I would recommend a family to watch this. The main actress Dakota Richards will go somewhere in life if she wants too.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
FYI
I use this blog as my online diary. To air out everything that is bothering me inside. Everything that is going on in my head. I hope I don't offend anyone. These are my true and honest thoughts about my life and everything I am going through. I hope this helps people who read this or at the least entertains you in some way. I don't care if you think I am crazy or laugh at me. I do this for my own saninty and not for anyone else but myself. You are welcome to contact me at any time. My e-mail address is mangosweetness@hotmail.com
Thank you, good day, good afternoon and good night.
Thank you, good day, good afternoon and good night.
Yeah Well
Ok, I feel like a huge loser. I don't know why. I just do. I have been cleaning my apartment and going through everything I own. There has been times where I haven't left the apartment for days at a time. I check facebook, myspace, ldslinkup and a few other sites everyday. I have applied for every job I can on careerbuilder.com in Las Vegas, Henderson and Utah. Monster.com doesn't have much to offer me. I do have my resume posted on Careerbuilder and Monster.com. I go to Nevada Job Connect a lot and just discovered Craiglist.com offers jobs too. I am getting ready to check them out too for work. I have also applied for any place I have seen on the local news looking to hire people. I'm not getting any calls back at all. The issue is there are more people looking for work than there are jobs out there. The Las Vegas job market isn't great right now. Also a lot of businesses are closing around here and construction projects are shutting down all the time.
Anyways, I went to church this last Sunday again. I went to a YSA (Young Single Adult) Ward. I liked the talks. A high counsel man, a young lady and a young man spoke. Then a young man sang. It was a nice sacrament meeting. I felt impressed to talk to the Bishop. His name is Bishop Clark. He told me I was too old to be in the ward and directed me to a family ward I am suppose to be in. I will check out the family ward next Sunday. I feel old and don't like the fact I have to be in a family ward. I also don't like the fact that there is only YSA wards around here. I hope I can find a Mid Singles Adult Ward (30 - 45). I don't have an issue with stopping everything that I am doing that is against the church. I'm just not ready to start wearing garments yet. Oh well, not a big deal yet at least not till I talk to the Bishop in the family ward I am suppose to be in.
Anyways, I went to church this last Sunday again. I went to a YSA (Young Single Adult) Ward. I liked the talks. A high counsel man, a young lady and a young man spoke. Then a young man sang. It was a nice sacrament meeting. I felt impressed to talk to the Bishop. His name is Bishop Clark. He told me I was too old to be in the ward and directed me to a family ward I am suppose to be in. I will check out the family ward next Sunday. I feel old and don't like the fact I have to be in a family ward. I also don't like the fact that there is only YSA wards around here. I hope I can find a Mid Singles Adult Ward (30 - 45). I don't have an issue with stopping everything that I am doing that is against the church. I'm just not ready to start wearing garments yet. Oh well, not a big deal yet at least not till I talk to the Bishop in the family ward I am suppose to be in.
The Secert of Nim's Island
Rated PG
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0410377/
Is a beautiful love story for adults an children. It is a love story and a daughter and her father. A a girl and her favorite writer (a stranger) and a love story between a man and a woman. A little girl has to protect her home from tourist while her father is lost at sea. The little girls friends are great. You will have to see the movie. I suggest this movie for all who enjoy Disney like family movies. I would also watch the deleted scenes.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0410377/
Is a beautiful love story for adults an children. It is a love story and a daughter and her father. A a girl and her favorite writer (a stranger) and a love story between a man and a woman. A little girl has to protect her home from tourist while her father is lost at sea. The little girls friends are great. You will have to see the movie. I suggest this movie for all who enjoy Disney like family movies. I would also watch the deleted scenes.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
My Friends in Need . . .
As I have been really busy cleaning my apartment and going through everything I own. Giving stuff to Desert Industries, the local library and the trash bins, obsessing over my own life. Trying to decide if I should go back to church or not, trying to look for work. Applying for jobs everywhere. Feeling very lonely. I found out that 1 of my friends who in breast cancer remission had to have her other breast removed this last week. Luckily she lives down the street so I can visit her.
Then my mother is urgently trying to get a hold of me. When I found this out, I knew something was wrong. The woman who was like a mother to me has stomach cancer. She had a huge tumor in her stomach. She had to have it removed. In addition she had 80% of her stomach removed, her glad bladder and some of her small intestine. Her stomach and small intestine where then reattached to each other. She will have to go through chemotherapy next. I can't visit her because she lives 10 hour drive, 2 hour flight away from me. I bought several cards to send her once a week or so wishing her to get well soon. Luckily before she had her surgery, she was able to visit her children and grandchildren.
I also found a friend who is going through testicle cancer is going to have to have a horrible surgery done or go through chemotherapy again. I feel so bad for him. I am afraid for him, the side effects of the surgery is horrible.
Then my nephew is starting first grade tomorrow. He had to call me this morning and tell me about his trip to the State Fair yesterday and that he is starting school tomorrow.
I don't know what to think, fell or do anymore. I have my friends and nephew in my prayers. I don't know what the Lord has in mind for us. But I will pray for them all. I wish them only the best in life and to have a long, long life.
Then my mother is urgently trying to get a hold of me. When I found this out, I knew something was wrong. The woman who was like a mother to me has stomach cancer. She had a huge tumor in her stomach. She had to have it removed. In addition she had 80% of her stomach removed, her glad bladder and some of her small intestine. Her stomach and small intestine where then reattached to each other. She will have to go through chemotherapy next. I can't visit her because she lives 10 hour drive, 2 hour flight away from me. I bought several cards to send her once a week or so wishing her to get well soon. Luckily before she had her surgery, she was able to visit her children and grandchildren.
I also found a friend who is going through testicle cancer is going to have to have a horrible surgery done or go through chemotherapy again. I feel so bad for him. I am afraid for him, the side effects of the surgery is horrible.
Then my nephew is starting first grade tomorrow. He had to call me this morning and tell me about his trip to the State Fair yesterday and that he is starting school tomorrow.
I don't know what to think, fell or do anymore. I have my friends and nephew in my prayers. I don't know what the Lord has in mind for us. But I will pray for them all. I wish them only the best in life and to have a long, long life.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
I Don't Know . . .
I don't know what to do with my life. Should I move to Utah where there is work? Should I move to Bakerfield's where there is work? Can I afford rent in either area? Do I know anyone in either areas? What about my family and the holiday's? What do I do? Can I make a decision? What do I want out of my life? Should I start internet dating? Will I get unemployment? Will I get a new job? If so, when and where? Will I ever be able to trust a man and get a boyfriend? Should I go back to church? Should I start wearing my garments again? Will anyone love me? Will I ever be happy? The things I enjoyed in the past, will I be able to enjoy again?
I pray all the time. I went to church last Sunday and likely again next Sunday. But do I want to be a 'good girl' again? Do I want to wear my garments again? Do I want to stop drinking? Do I want to pay tithing again? Do I want to not wear my earrings (I have 4 piercing in each ear)? Will I ever be able to over come my dyslexia and become a writer? Will I ever be able to be my own boss? Will I ever be a fashion designer? Will I be able to find work where I can use my education?
So many things going on in my head all at once. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know where to start and what thoughts I should I put to the side? It's heard to listen to what other people have to say. What they think you should do and not do with your life. I know everyone has good intentions. They just want to help. They just want to be good people too. They just want to be appreciated as people too. Just like I do. I want someone to admire me. Call me smart, understand or at least get my thoughts and actions.
I pray all the time. I went to church last Sunday and likely again next Sunday. But do I want to be a 'good girl' again? Do I want to wear my garments again? Do I want to stop drinking? Do I want to pay tithing again? Do I want to not wear my earrings (I have 4 piercing in each ear)? Will I ever be able to over come my dyslexia and become a writer? Will I ever be able to be my own boss? Will I ever be a fashion designer? Will I be able to find work where I can use my education?
So many things going on in my head all at once. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know where to start and what thoughts I should I put to the side? It's heard to listen to what other people have to say. What they think you should do and not do with your life. I know everyone has good intentions. They just want to help. They just want to be good people too. They just want to be appreciated as people too. Just like I do. I want someone to admire me. Call me smart, understand or at least get my thoughts and actions.
Ok Now
So the former co-worker who I saw at church yesterday. He contacted me via twitter.com. He's not a member yet. I told him I will be at his baptism.
We will see what happens next.
We will see what happens next.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
My Big Adventures
Today I went to church for the first time in years. All on my own, I wasn't visiting anyone. I woke up late so I was running late. I feel out of place in my life right now. Anyways, I walked in and they were passing the sacrament.
I saw a family ward with some men watching their boys. It was cute. I also heard their primary singing. That was a nice sound. I then walked into the chapel once the sacrament was done being passed. I sat in the first open spot I found between a woman and a man (the man was on the end of the row)(they were not sitting next to each other nor were they together).
I sat there and listened to the talks. The first was a returned missionary who has been home for 6 whole weeks. He was cute, he was very nervous and unsure of himself. Next was a gentleman who was getting married later this month. He was a long time member of the ward (which they all laughed about, I didn't get it). During his talk I started reading the Hymn book. I was reading the songs and singing them in my head. Then he started saying the words I was reading. Freaked me out a little bit.
Then there was a nice musical number where a gentleman played the cello and a girl played the piano. The last talk was a young lady. She was from San Diego and just graduated college. Her sister was in the ward.
Some time during the talks I looked around the room. It is a small ward. A good mix of men and women. Then I noticed to the my right this guy I went out on a date with from work. I don't date co-workers but I felt bad for him. He is a nice guy and very shy. He also never told me he was LDS.
When sacrament meeting was over, the girl sitting next to me started talking to me. She asked me my name and if I was new and where I was from, etc. I answered her questions and then told her I had to leave. On my ways out and saw a gentleman I knew from a previous ward. We were both in the Foothills Ward together when he got back home from his mission. He was a nice guy and very shy then. I figured he would have been married by now.
I will try again next Sunday. I am a little nervous because the ward is 18 - 30 years old and I am 31. I don't know if they will let me be in that ward and I don't know if I want to go to it or not. I'm not ready to wear my garments yet. I don't have an issue with spot drinking and the other stuff I am doing. I'm just not ready to start pay tithing and wearing my garments again.
We will see what happens. Time will only tell. I was nervous the whole time I was there. I thought it was nice of the girl to start talking to me like that. But I don't know if I want to get to know anyone just yet.
I saw a family ward with some men watching their boys. It was cute. I also heard their primary singing. That was a nice sound. I then walked into the chapel once the sacrament was done being passed. I sat in the first open spot I found between a woman and a man (the man was on the end of the row)(they were not sitting next to each other nor were they together).
I sat there and listened to the talks. The first was a returned missionary who has been home for 6 whole weeks. He was cute, he was very nervous and unsure of himself. Next was a gentleman who was getting married later this month. He was a long time member of the ward (which they all laughed about, I didn't get it). During his talk I started reading the Hymn book. I was reading the songs and singing them in my head. Then he started saying the words I was reading. Freaked me out a little bit.
Then there was a nice musical number where a gentleman played the cello and a girl played the piano. The last talk was a young lady. She was from San Diego and just graduated college. Her sister was in the ward.
Some time during the talks I looked around the room. It is a small ward. A good mix of men and women. Then I noticed to the my right this guy I went out on a date with from work. I don't date co-workers but I felt bad for him. He is a nice guy and very shy. He also never told me he was LDS.
When sacrament meeting was over, the girl sitting next to me started talking to me. She asked me my name and if I was new and where I was from, etc. I answered her questions and then told her I had to leave. On my ways out and saw a gentleman I knew from a previous ward. We were both in the Foothills Ward together when he got back home from his mission. He was a nice guy and very shy then. I figured he would have been married by now.
I will try again next Sunday. I am a little nervous because the ward is 18 - 30 years old and I am 31. I don't know if they will let me be in that ward and I don't know if I want to go to it or not. I'm not ready to wear my garments yet. I don't have an issue with spot drinking and the other stuff I am doing. I'm just not ready to start pay tithing and wearing my garments again.
We will see what happens. Time will only tell. I was nervous the whole time I was there. I thought it was nice of the girl to start talking to me like that. But I don't know if I want to get to know anyone just yet.
Definitely, Maybe
I just wanted to see this movie because I loved 'About a Boy' and 'Love Actually'. I loved it. It was a great story.
The story was a dad telling him the love story of him and her mother. It was so well told, so well written and so well acted. I really enjoyed this film and when I get some money I will buy this movie and make my Grandparents watch it. I know they would love it. Specially my Grandmother Jeanne.
I'm falling in love with the actor Ryan Reynolds. I have loved Abigail Breslin since I saw 'Little Miss Sunshine' (which is also an amazing movie).
I would suggest any and all adults to watch this. You too will feel the love coming off the screen.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0832266/
The story was a dad telling him the love story of him and her mother. It was so well told, so well written and so well acted. I really enjoyed this film and when I get some money I will buy this movie and make my Grandparents watch it. I know they would love it. Specially my Grandmother Jeanne.
I'm falling in love with the actor Ryan Reynolds. I have loved Abigail Breslin since I saw 'Little Miss Sunshine' (which is also an amazing movie).
I would suggest any and all adults to watch this. You too will feel the love coming off the screen.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0832266/
Friday, August 8, 2008
I am thinking . . .
I have been thinking. I haven't been feeling well the last few days. I can't keep anything down. I feel very alone. I can't find a job or get an interview with anyone. I have been applying for jobs out of state now. I feel like my family doesn't want me around. I don't know what to do with myself.
The only thing I can think of is move into my car and drive around until I run out of money and live there. Give up everything I own, change my name. I just don't know what to do for work. Can I be waitress if I live out of car?
Anyways, feeling alone is no biggie and nothing new with me. Just another thing for me to get over. See you all around.
The only thing I can think of is move into my car and drive around until I run out of money and live there. Give up everything I own, change my name. I just don't know what to do for work. Can I be waitress if I live out of car?
Anyways, feeling alone is no biggie and nothing new with me. Just another thing for me to get over. See you all around.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
I Want . . .
I want . . .
a pets: a kitty, a puppy, a fish and a goose . . .
a companion, someone (mainly a man) to talk to . . .
a baby, children . . .
good strong self-esteem . . .
a good car, with low gas mileage, good a/c, good heater, low mileage, radio, good wheels . . .
a career, a profession . . .
a writer, a story teller, published . . .
to own my own business, be my own boss . . .
to be good at something that others want to get my advise, my help, want to learn from me . . .
to much . . .
a pets: a kitty, a puppy, a fish and a goose . . .
a companion, someone (mainly a man) to talk to . . .
a baby, children . . .
good strong self-esteem . . .
a good car, with low gas mileage, good a/c, good heater, low mileage, radio, good wheels . . .
a career, a profession . . .
a writer, a story teller, published . . .
to own my own business, be my own boss . . .
to be good at something that others want to get my advise, my help, want to learn from me . . .
to much . . .
So Now
I had an interview with Robert Half yesterday. Haven't heard anything yet about it.
I finally heard back from my doctor about my latest biopsy and everything is fine. I am ok like I thought.
I will be going to Eastridge Temp Agency in the morning.
Still cleaning the apartment and going through everything I own.
I have been applying for jobs online in Utah today. I have been looking at Las Vegas and Henderson for a while and nothing. Next I think I will check Arizona or something.
I hope everyone is doing well. Still feeling lonely. Thinking about going back to church on Sunday. We will see.
I finally heard back from my doctor about my latest biopsy and everything is fine. I am ok like I thought.
I will be going to Eastridge Temp Agency in the morning.
Still cleaning the apartment and going through everything I own.
I have been applying for jobs online in Utah today. I have been looking at Las Vegas and Henderson for a while and nothing. Next I think I will check Arizona or something.
I hope everyone is doing well. Still feeling lonely. Thinking about going back to church on Sunday. We will see.
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Ok, Yeah
As you can tell in my pervious post. I was not having a good day. I am having bad days and good days. More bad currently because of what is going on in my life. But like everything else, I get through it all. I will survie. I will be stronger. I will be more determined to do my own thing.
On the board for tomorrow, cancel my appointment with the employement lawyer because I don't have the consaltion fee yet. I have to reschedule it for later when I do have the money. Call into my doctor's office to check on the status of my latest biopsy (which I am sure I am ok, like all the ones in the past). Sign up with a temp agency so I can start working soon. I am still applying for at least 1 job a day (except for today, I have to many other things to do, so tomorrow I will have to make up for it). Clean my apartment (I really need to do dishes) and go through more boxes (I have a lot of things, trying to rid of a lot). And if I have time and engery sew something (I was working on a dress before I got fired and a roommate).
Please keep me in your prayers. You are all in mine. Thank you for your support in my life. I hope everything is going well for all of you.
Love Yeah
On the board for tomorrow, cancel my appointment with the employement lawyer because I don't have the consaltion fee yet. I have to reschedule it for later when I do have the money. Call into my doctor's office to check on the status of my latest biopsy (which I am sure I am ok, like all the ones in the past). Sign up with a temp agency so I can start working soon. I am still applying for at least 1 job a day (except for today, I have to many other things to do, so tomorrow I will have to make up for it). Clean my apartment (I really need to do dishes) and go through more boxes (I have a lot of things, trying to rid of a lot). And if I have time and engery sew something (I was working on a dress before I got fired and a roommate).
Please keep me in your prayers. You are all in mine. Thank you for your support in my life. I hope everything is going well for all of you.
Love Yeah
Saturday, August 2, 2008
What's Up?
I am so frustrated with my life. No job, no boyfriend, no kids, no pets, nothing to keep me entertained. I apply for jobs all day long and clean all day long. I feel so alone. I feel left behind. I feel like a major loser with nothing to do and no where to go. I have started grinding my teeth in my sleep again. I hate the weight I am at. I am the biggest I have ever been because of damm drugs again. I want to stop all the drugs I am on but I don't know how my body is going to respond to that.
I need to feel loved, feel cared for. Like someone is actually worried about me and the things I am going through. I know my family loves me. I know I have friends who care for me. But I come from a family who isn't nice to you unless they want something from you. Who doesn't talk to you unless they want something. And people forget about you because they don't need anything from you or just don't see you around any more.
I have a very hard time trusting people because of the way I was raised. Because of the way people act or react, I think everything is fishy. I over think and over analyse everything, everyone including myself. And a lot of the time I don't know what to do. Because I don't trust people I think people don't trust me.
I also say a lot of things that may hurt people's feelings. I don't say it because I want to hurt people's feelings. I just say what I am thinking and don't always think ahead. I also think if its the truth what's the issue. Also a lot of people don't get my humor, when I am trying to be funny, I am not trying to hurt feelings or freak people out.
I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't know who I am any more. I don't know where to go or what to do. None of my many hobbies are entertaining me right now. I start them and stop them shortly there after because all I can think about is cleaning and finding a job. There are not enough hours in the day to please everyone.
I need to feel loved, feel cared for. Like someone is actually worried about me and the things I am going through. I know my family loves me. I know I have friends who care for me. But I come from a family who isn't nice to you unless they want something from you. Who doesn't talk to you unless they want something. And people forget about you because they don't need anything from you or just don't see you around any more.
I have a very hard time trusting people because of the way I was raised. Because of the way people act or react, I think everything is fishy. I over think and over analyse everything, everyone including myself. And a lot of the time I don't know what to do. Because I don't trust people I think people don't trust me.
I also say a lot of things that may hurt people's feelings. I don't say it because I want to hurt people's feelings. I just say what I am thinking and don't always think ahead. I also think if its the truth what's the issue. Also a lot of people don't get my humor, when I am trying to be funny, I am not trying to hurt feelings or freak people out.
I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't know who I am any more. I don't know where to go or what to do. None of my many hobbies are entertaining me right now. I start them and stop them shortly there after because all I can think about is cleaning and finding a job. There are not enough hours in the day to please everyone.
The Hammer 2
Woo Hoo I own the dvd of 'The Hammer' with Adam Carolla. I suggest everyone to see this movie! It isn't sold everywhere. Some Best Buys, some Sun Coasts and I don't know about Fry's.
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